not an island

After dropping off Kaidou, Kusuo apports his shonen magazines for cash and goes shopping.

The math and physics textbooks he'd stolen from Kusuke when he'd left would probably have given him more money but he'd rather keep those. Weirdly enough, in his current situation they offer more entertainment value. Or well, enrichment value at least. Also the notes his brother had left in their margins, mostly regarding Kusuo, give them a sort of twisted sentimental value.

However since he did choose to cash in the shonen magazines instead, his budget is pretty small, so he'll have to choose his purchases carefully. Kusuo heads to a store that he remembers having good deals.

It's strange being around so many people. Back during his failed attempt at an ordinary life he'd always found crowds supremely annoying, but with those days so far behind him there's something nostalgic about being surrounded by strangers who rarely give him a second thought.

Kusuo wanders through the aisles and eventually finds himself standing wistfully in front of the coffee jelly. Obviously it would be stupid to blow all 2,880 yen on coffee jelly. In less than a month it will all be gone and then it's back to living on coconut, seaweed and fish until he dies or the world finally forgets about him.

Frankly he probably shouldn't get any coffee jelly at all. He knows himself well enough to know that giving himself a taste of something he'd lost will just make it harder for him to go on without it again.

He's still standing there when Kusuke finds him. Kusuo supposes that it's his own fault really. It had been stupid of him to go to a store in his hometown and doubly so to be so wrapped up in trying to argue himself out of coffee jelly that he did not notice Kusuke's approach before his brother was standing behind him, staring.

Is it him? Is it really him? He thinks, distant and shaky.

Don't you know it's rude to stare at a lady? Geez. Kusuo says, not turning to look at his brother nor visibly acknowledge his presence in any way.

"It is you." He sounds relieved.

What are you doing here?

"I think that would be a better question to ask you. Since you're Kusuko right now, I doubt this means that you've decided you're done hiding."

I don't think I'll ever be "done hiding."

"You didn't answer my question."

You didn't either.

"I'm picking up a few things for Mom, but you could have found that out on your own." He smiles in that cloyingly false way of his and adds, "Your turn.~"

I was thinking about getting myself something nice, though since you're here I clearly came to the wrong place for that, Kusuo says and begins walking away from this pointless conversation.

"Wait!" Kusuke grabs hold of Kusuo's shoulder.

Kusuo reflexively grabs onto his arm and wrenches his grip from her shoulder. Fortunately she manages to catch herself before going through with flipping him over her head and potentially blowing her cover. Still she keeps hold of his arm, if only as an implicit threat.

"Don't just disappear again," Kusuke says, surprisingly distraught. Then more composed he adds, "Mom misses you. She's gotten really clingy since you left."

Kusuke's lying. He misses Kusuo just as much as she does if not more. It's pathetic really.

Kusuo decides it wouldn't be worth it to call him on this, at least not yet.You're the one who made it so I couldn't go back home without painting a huge target on all of your backs.

"Well, you're the one who's too much of a coward to just make sure no one would dare to touch what's yours!"

We both know you'd hate to be mine like that.

Kusuke snorts,"I can take care of myself. Besides you hate me too much for threats to my well-being to be a useful weapon against you."

Kusuo would have preferred it if Kusuke had just slapped him in the face. That at least would have hurt less. Kusuo drops Kusuke's arm, and starts walking away.

Unfortunately Kusuke follows him, "I don't think all the armies in the world could stand against you if you chose to stay and fight, so why are you always running away? "

Kusuo just keeps walking. It's not like Kusuke would understand his answer anyway.

*

When Shun gets home, his sister Sora lets out a little yelp when she opens the door to see him. She proceeds to stare at him like she's not sure he's really there.

"Could you let me through?" Shun asks eventually.

"Oh. Sorry," Sora says, moving aside to let him pass, "I wasn't expecting you to come back."

"It's good to see you too, Sora." Shun says, pulling off his shoes.

"Don't be like that!" Sora snaps, "Mom said you didn't make it out when your plane went down. We all thought you were dead."

At this point their mother comes to the entryway to see what the fuss is, Toki trailing behind her.

Upon seeing Shun she rushes to hug him.

"Oh, Shun baby, you're alive!" she says relieved tears flowing from her eyes, "I was so scared I'd lost you."

Shun starts crying himself, "I was scared too. I thought I'd never see any of you again."

"There, there baby. You got back to us in the end," Shun's mother says, rubbing calming circles on Shun's back.

"How did you get back anyway?" Toki asked.

Shun straightens up, excited, "Oh yeah you're not going to believe it. Black Swan subject Ψ -you know that esper kid who was all over the news a few years back?- saved me."

"Shun we've been over this. Don't lie to your brother, " Shun's mother says sternly, "Especially about something like this. It's in bad taste."

"But that's really what happened," Shun says, feeling that it's vastly unfair to get chewed out for lying when he's actually being honest for once.

"This isn't funny Shun," his mom says, her voice and expression both strangely tight, "I've let you indulge in your weird obsession as long as it didn't interfere with your grades. Was that a mistake? Do I have to cut your internet access?"

"No mom," Shun says desperately.

"Good, then we'll speak no more about this, okay?" she says, gently laying a hand on Shun's shoulder.

"Okay," Shun agrees, relieved that he's not going to have to make up a more plausible explanation.

*

Kusuo's chance at something like an ordinary life was destroyed more or less by simple bad luck. In spite of this, or perhaps even because of it, Kusuo is plagued by endless if-onlys.

If only he'd been more careful to stay aware of his surroundings. If only he hadn't let himself become so dependent on his limiters for controlling his powers. If only he'd tried any other solution besides going to his brother for help either then or when the need for the limiters arose in the first place.

There's also the sickening possibility that there was no way he could have avoided this fate only delayed it. That he could only have lived among humanity until some aspect of his careful charade failed, forcing him to place himself above or away from it instead, simply because of what he was.

In the end though he supposes that it doesn't matter if he could have avoided this. All that matters is that he hadn't.

He'd been having a pleasant enough Sunday until he broke the pink ball of his limiter against a low-hanging tree-branch that he'd misjudged his proximity to. The effect is like a dam bursting. The trickle of thoughts flowing into his mind rapidly swells to a raging flood as the range of his telepathy expands. Kusuo somehow manages not to pass out from the drastic increase of stimulation but it's a near thing.

He takes a step forward and puts his foot through the sidewalk and ankle deep into the ground underneath. Trying to pull it out only results in a matching hole for his other foot.

He looks around and, finding a sufficient lack of onlookers, levitates himself out restoring the sidewalk beneath him. He apparently turns back the time on it considerably more than one day judging by how conspicuously clean and new the restored segment looks compared to the surrounding pieces.

Why is this so hard? He hasn't even had the limiter for two years yet, why can't he go back to functioning without it like he did before?

Actually, who is he kidding? He'd spent the months leading up to the installation of the limiters scared of going to sleep in case he did something irreversible while unconscious, and monitoring his every thought to make sure he didn't accidentally use his mind control.

Oh no, is his mind control unblocked? Kusuo tries desperately to make his mind as blank as possible, not wanting to find out the hard way if it is.

He teleports to Kusuke's room in the hopes that his brother can help him. Of course, he knows perfectly well what a terrible idea this is, but he really doesn't want to hang around feeling like a live wire until he thinks of a better option.

Kusuke is sitting at his desk filling out forms of some kind when Kusuo lands on his bed.

"How many times do I have to tell you that just because you don't come through the door doesn't mean that the 'Keep Out' sign on it doesn't apply," Kusuke says, whipping around to face him.

I need your help. Kusuo says, cringing internally at how his telepathic voice sounds distorted and too loud, like it's being played through a damaged speaker.

Kusuke's eyes drift towards the absence of the pink ball a top the limiter. His thoughts drift that way too, shaken loose from the usual obfuscating recitations he usually uses to interfere with Kusuo reading his mind.

"Of course I'll help you, my dearest little brother," Kusuke says, a concerning grin on his face. He's very carefully avoiding thinking about something, filling his head with some mathematical series Kusuo neither knows nor cares about. After this Kusuo will think that he should probably have found this more suspicious but right now he's too overwhelmed by the thoughts of all the other people in his massively expanded range to give it much notice.

He pulls the broken limiter out and discards it. Then before Kusuo realizes what's happening he pulls out its twin on the other side as well. He fiddles with it until it makes a small beep and then puts it in where the limiter once was. The entire process takes mere seconds.

Kusuke stumbles backwards, like he's as shocked as Kusuo is that he just completed his self-assigned mission of ruining Kusuo's life.

To himself he thinks, Oh god Kusuo is going to kill me for this. It was worth it though.

Aloud he says, an awful light shining in his eyes, "I can't believe that actually worked. It looks like I've finally managed to get a win in, Kusuo."